


Suffocation

by BrokenxHappiness



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Drug Dealing, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Hanahaki Disease, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Lee Seokmin | DK-centric, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Minor Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Seokmin | DK, Sick Character, Sickfic, Unrequited Love, protect seokmin, seokmin is a ray of sunshine, sunshine seokmin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-08
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-04-20 03:08:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14251755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenxHappiness/pseuds/BrokenxHappiness
Summary: It was dark and hollow.As far as he tried to reach out, the only thing he could touch was absolute nothingness.Complete void was how he felt.He was once blinded by hands of backstabbing traitors who fluffed his vision with a twisted reality, pouring paint on a blank canvas that should've stayed empty, as now that the hands were removed blankness was all he could see.Day in and day out, a bone straining routine; get up, get ready for school, then turn in for the night before he start it all again. It wears him out, to slave away the day on a path that had no destination.





	Suffocation

"Ji! What's the hold up?" Seokmin whined as he tugged the boy's sleeve, hurrying their pace to their usual hang out spot at the Carat Cafe.

Dragging his feet along, it irks him to not be able to share the same levels of spirit as Seokmin. They both experienced the same event and yet, as it seems Jisoo was the only one left in spite by the situation.

Stirring his lukewarm cup of coffee, he barely listened to the boy droning on and on about his day in an animated tale.

"So there I was- clutching on to Mr Kwon's last bit of papers and I ran off to the edge of the cliff-"

But Seokmin's words simply drained right out of his left ear as he kept stirring his drink hazily.

"YAH!" Seokmin slammed his palm on the round table between them.

"You're CLEARLY not paying any attention to me, you're just nodding your head with occasional noises of acknowledgement even after I told you that lame ass fake story!"

A little taken aback by the sudden outrage, Jisoo mumbled his apology.

"What's up with you these days?" Seokmin pouted before munching on his bagel sourly.

Finally, the silent ticking bomb went off.

"Me? What about YOU?! ACTING ALL AS THOUGH EVERYTHING WAS HAPPY AND DANDY! WHAT'S UP WITH YOU-!?" Jisoo burst out before he even realises the words he spat out.

The silence that hung in the air of the cafe was heavy. Everyone around them were stiffen by the thick tension surrounding them.

"Well- fine.. if you want to stay like that," Seokmin could barely even managed as he picked his bag off the floor and made his way out of the cafe.

His tears were already streaming down his face before he could even reach the door, but he kept on walking, leaving Jisoo by himself.

The stale air around Jisoo finally moved, only to leave him along with every step Seokmin took away from him. His chest tightens as he tried gasping for air to breathe.

For weeks he's been stuck in this stagnant routine only to escape into a pitch of complete darkness.

  
~❀~

The second his feet stepped onto the carpet of his apartment, his knees made way and his body crashed to the floor. Tears were streaming down his face.

Jisoo's words rang in his ears as his heart pounded hard in his chest to the point he felt like reaching down and ripping it straight out of his chest.

He felt the strain on the back of his throat but he swallowed it down just as he did since that very day it began hurting.

  
~❀~

_"It begins immediately, the second you find out- the effects takes place that very second," Hansol warned._

_Seokmin held the pill in his palm._

_"But, let's say if it all goes south.. how long can I hold it down?" The hope in Seokmin's eyes glistened but failed to mask the fear in his throbbing though his veins._

_His heart dropped as Hansol scoffed at the hopeful remark._

_"I've heard cases, a kid named Chan barely even had time to lay it all out before he find out the truth, he managed for three days- but it took its toll from within. So, if you change your mind..." Hansol opened his hand, ready to accept the return of the tiny pill._

  
~❀~

Seokmin could barely breath as he felt the pain shooting through him, like roots coursing though his veins.

He gasped for air, clawing on the skin of his neck as the twisting torment bled on. Gagging into his hands, his mind spun as his limbs were slowly getting heavier.

  
~❀~

_"Seokmin! It's been weeks! You can't hold on like this for much longer or you'll explode!" Hansol snapped, shaking the boy by his shoulders._

_"Just one more dose-" Seokmin managed, stuffing the crumpled bills into the latter's hand._

_Despite being known as the cold hearted dealer who had never shown a tinge of concern for his clients, Seokmin had always been a different case for Hansol since the start._

_The two practically grew up together. So when the day came when Seokmin requested for a pill, Hansol was beyond reluctant to provide._

_Slipping the vile out of his pocket, he bit off the cork and poured the bluish silvery contents down Seokmin's throat._

_He could feel the warm liquid coursing through him, numbing the pains all over his limbs and his heart. All that was left was the soreness at the back of his throat, the reaction of the delphinium mixture had burned his tonsils but that was a pain he was willing to tolerate._

_"How long- How long more are you going to rely on these suppressions?" Hansol threw the vile to the wall._

_The sound of the glass shattering onto the floor was the only response he received. He held back the tears that were threatening to break free._

_"You promised me that you'll go to Sungcheol to get it removed.. you promised me that the second this began- you'll get over this," his voice dropped to a whisper as his fingers ran through Seokmin's mused hair._

_"I'm sorry," was all Seokmin could manage before he slipped back into darkness._

  
~❀~

Seokmin scrambled for his phone with his left hand as his right was still clinging onto the pain on his throat.

_'The number you have reached is disengaged.'_

"Hansol.. please just one more-" He pled, dialing the number once more.

_'The number you have reached is disengaged.'_

"Please.." He wheezed.

  
~❀~

Ten minutes before it all went downhill, Seokmin held the pill in his palm, debating his options. He wondered if what Hansol mentioned was true.

That there's more to life than measly soulmates and finding your significant other.

But he was sure of the feelings he had brewed within his heart and he was almost certain that the feelings were mutual.

_"You don't HAVE to do this-" was the final warning Hansol had left him._

Finally, he popped the pill into his mouth and down it with the tiny vile of delphinium concoction.

Two minutes was how long it took for the pill to take action, dispersing into every portion of his veins. Sparing an extra minute just to be sure, Seokmin finally knocked on Jisoo's apartment door.

He could've sworn that his heart stopped when the latter opened the door in his comfy looking oversized sweater that used to belong to Seokmin. Suppressing a pleased smile, he greeted Jisoo, his fingers fiddling with nerves.

Jisoo invited the boy in, despite the sudden intrusion.

"I'm not going to dwell on this for any longer, because I don't want the effects of the pill to wear off- I just need to tell you. I love you," without leaving any room for interjections, Seokmin spoke his heart.

Alas, his confidence took a turn when he felt the ticklish prick on the back of his throat.

_He coughed._

"I'm sorry-" Jisoo began.

_The bile was piling up, blocking the air from entering his lungs._

"I'm took one three months ago- for Seungcheol, but.."

Seokmin tried his best to stifle the coughing fit that was itching his vocal chords.

"He said that he found his other half already.." Jisoo placed a concerned hand on top of Seokmin's that were balled in a fist.

"I was his first removal operation... before he went out on the streets.." Jisoo explained.

"So I'm void of all romantic emotions.." guilt seeping in place of the love that Seokmin had hoped for.

  
~❀~

"Please.. I don't want to lose this feeling.." Seokmin begged but the line was still dead.

He doubled over in pain as he coughed out the first few blood stained petals.

_Pearl Burgundy._

How ironic, the colour Jisoo simply loved.

  
~❀~

Hansol ran straight to Seokmin's apartment, the second his phone rang. He knew what requests the boy had for him, but he couldn't bring himself to supply Seokmin with another dose of suppressions.

He dialed his phone and instantly barked at the receiver, "Get ready! I'm bringing Seokmin in! He finally caved! Meet us at my place!"

Hansol slammed the door open, calling out for Seokmin's name. Sieving his way through the pile of petals, he found the boy where the bloodstain was most concentrated.

"I'm sorry Seok- but I had to do this for you," He whispered gently as he picked up the unconscious body off the floor and carried the latter straight for his own apartment.

"Everything is going to be better, I promise," He gently cooed.

"I won't let you suffer in this pain any longer-"

  
~❀~

The myth of the _Hanahaki Disease_ , in which the victim coughs up flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. It ends when the beloved returns their feelings (romantic love only; strong friendship is not enough), or when the victim dies.

It can be cured through surgical removal, but when the infection is removed, the victim's romantic feelings also disappears.

_But myths stirred from truth._

In reality, there is a drug that binds the souls of two lovers in a happy life where death do they part. Reasons why people often sought after this drug is because it is the one way ticket to a happy ending, although the down side to this drug brings about what is known as the 'hanahaki disease'.

Countless of people had tried to go without it, going after their loved ones in what seems to be a fruitless chase. Relationships ending with heartbreak and life ending without love. There was no way for love to grow without this drug.

Desperation brought about savagery and as such, this drug had been banned. People are made to live a content life in forced relationships with the sole purpose of breeding the next generation into a family that lacks the essence of love.

Underground, there are dealers, trading and selling these drugs for a high cost although if it ends with death, no further charge would be necessary.

Hansol was the leading smuggler, working in a close knitted community with Seungcheol by his side who would operate on those who had the adverse effects of the drug.

A corrupted system for a corrupted world where love is lost to the fear of such a myth.

_The Hanahaki Disease was no myth._

It was a consequence of getting ahead of yourself in such an unrequited relationship.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Well I hope you've enjoyed that.
> 
> I've never written about the hanahaki disease before but G did once suggested the idea to me before last year.
> 
> So I hope I get to lay this out well enough.
> 
> Thanks for reading


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